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Mom Guilt | The two well-known words that mean you have felt shame, guilt, and inadequacy in your role of being a mom. In these modern times of Pinterest, Facebook, and Instagram, we often find ourselves feeling like we are failing our family.
Let’s throw in our friendships that we are striving to keep alive, our full-time jobs, and all the laundry and house cleaning that falls on our to-do lists. We barely have time for ourselves, sleep, and somehow manage to wake up the next morning to start it all over again.
I was never good at juggling and I certainly didn’t want to be a juggler when I grew up. Why? Because with my coordination, all of the balls thrown in the air are bound to come tumbling around me and even hitting me on the head.
Then there is the famous Proverbs 31 woman and you know that you are not that woman and fall short every day. We can barely make due with everything that surrounds us. As you read the passage, you feel overwhelmed and like a failure on an entirely different level because you can’t sew, garden, and obviously forgot to make sure your family’s winter clothes were mended.
Are we failing our family because we are not baking them tasty treats they can brag about, having a gourmet meal prepared without delay at dinner time, making sure the pantry is stocked with your kid’s favorite snacks, and they have clean clothes for the next day?
Oh, don’t forget the perfect color-coded calendar that has every activity and chore listed!
Perhaps we are failing them by struggling to survive to do all the unnecessary expectations that society has placed on us, as a mom and neglecting the care of your soul?
Let’s put aside Proverbs 31 and forget that woman for a moment, let’s look at the story of Mary and Martha!
Luke 10:38-42 NIV| As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Jesus said, “Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her.” Instead of being distracted by the distractions that needed to be done, she chose to sit at the feet of Jesus and listen to what he said.
The beginning of a Proverbs 31 woman begins with a Mary heart. When you place God first, you will be clothed in strength, dignity, love, contentment, and compassion. You will walk in peace and think about the good things of Christ.
In order to find balance in your life as a wife, mom, friend, and not lose yourself, you must sit at the feet of Jesus and rest. Ideally, you want to do this before your family rises so that you can have your alone time reading the Word of God, praying, and listening to Him. When you allow yourself time to do this, everything else will fall into place – even having the characteristics of a Proverbs 31 woman! Your distractions will become less like distractions and you will be joyful in providing and caring for your household. Each day you will be renewed and as you spend time with God, these things will be added to you.
There are going to be unavoidable events that happen, you’re going to oversleep, you’re going to forget to pack your kid’s lunch, and let the bread run out before you make it to the store. It’s okay because even on the days you fall short, praise God for His grace because it’s there!
So, don’t get caught up in being a Proverbs 31 woman, start with a Mary heart, and embrace the adventure of becoming a Proverbs 31 woman.
Your Sister In Christ,