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My Life Verse
Blessed be the Lord! Day by day he bears our burdens; God is our salvation.
Psalms 68:19 (CSB)
My Life Notes
Living with Chronic Illness is much like carrying a heavy backpack twenty-four hours a day.
I did not ask for the heaviness that hangs onto my body with greed.
Baggage, light, in the beginning, grew heavier with each new day.
Soon I found the burdens I carried had become heavier than my life or my body could handle.
How does one move forward with the heaviness day after day after day?
Faced with the choice of hanging on or letting go the burdens quickly taking over my life,
I had to make a choice. How did I want to live in a way that honored God,
brought hope to the weary, and live fully in and with His grace?
My Life Lesson
All my life I have struggled with control, and now I found myself living stripped of self-reliance.
Reconciling the two was difficult at best and near impossible.
I had to make an intentional choice to hand my burdens over to God.
I had to acknowledge I could not do this on my own.
I sat before the Lord, mentally examining all the things I was carrying around.
My need to do it all, be it all and fix it all
My Super-woman complex
The expectation of blessing my list rather than submitting to His will
The independent, self-controlling, self-reliant, independent Super Woman had to go.
One by one, I carefully emptied the weight I could no longer carry on my own,
submitting to the power of God, submitting to the supernatural strength of a faithful God.
A faithful God who promises to bear my burdens.
To do so required a daily “baggage check,” a daily dying to self
and submitting my very stubborn will to God.
It is a regular process, and some days it looks more like a tug of war than submission.
My Life Prayer
Heavenly Father, you are a good, good Father.
Your Word tells us you will carry our burdens, help us, Father,
to willingly let them go and trust you with them.
Forgive us when we hang on, believing that we know best.