Find It Only Here On Friday: 7 Ways To Handle Criticism

Self-proclaimed “recovering idiot” Kurt Bubna
has been in pastoral ministry since 1976
and now serves as the Senior Pastor of Eastpoint Church,
a vibrant, growing, and community-focused congregation
in Spokane Valley, Washington (EastpointChurch.org).

Kurt is also an inspiring regular contributor (LifeWriter) here at LifeLetter Cafe
and is leading the way with the inaugural “Find It Only Here On Friday”.
His Cafe exclusive “How To Handle Criticism” can be found below . .
BUT FIRST . . the Cafe thought you just might want to know
how an Encouragement Leader like Kurt Bubna has himself been encouraged
in his own faith recently.

In his own words …

I had coffee yesterday with an old friend. He reminded me of something I need to remember;
“It’s only the first 100 years or so of life that’s hard!”
Sometimes I forget Jesus never promised to make my life easy.
In fact, He said we would have trouble in this world (John 16:33),
but He also said that’s not the end of the story. “Take heart, I have overcome the world.”
Glad to know we win in the end, and delighted that I’ve only got another 40-50 years to go
‘til I reach a hundred!

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s Find It Only Here On Friday
“7 Ways To Handle Criticism”
by Kurt Bubna

Some time ago …

after a service, a woman came up to me with fire in her eyes. She was ticked, and I was about to become the brunt of her unrestrained wrath.

“I am so fed up with you preachers telling me to trust Jesus,” she said. “You have no idea what it’s like to have two teenage kids who are always in trouble! You have no idea what it’s like to live with a worthless man who sucks the life out of you! You have no idea what it’s like to wish you could hit the ‘do over’ button!” Then, after emotionally puking all over me, she turned around and stomped away in disgust.

I thought about going after her, but she scared me, and I was more than a little dumbfounded by her reaction to what I thought was a great message on trust. Silly me.

 

Her harsh words …

sent me into a nosedive. I knew at that moment I could choose to lie in a cesspool of self-analyzing misery or put into practice some tactics I’ve learned for handling criticism and rejection. I chose the latter.

  • Respond rather than react. In fact, intentionally under-react.
  • Evaluate honestly, “What can I learn through this?” Cut yourself some slack here too; you’re not as good or perfect as you’d like to be. It’s okay.
  • Remember, often we speak to others out of our pain and frustration. People fail just like we fail. Aspire to understand the offender.
  • Try not to take everything so personal. It might not be about you.
  • Take your pain to the One who can handle it best.
  • Try to listen first and foremost to the One voice that matters most. Sometimes we need to turn down the volume of our critics and turn up our sensitivity to the Father’s words.
  • Forgive as you’ve been forgiven. Holding on to our desire for retribution or revenge is not an option.

I’ve come to understand and accept that criticism is unavoidable. We must learn to keep our eyes on Jesus who was criticized too. So the next time you feel hurt by someone’s harsh words, ask the Lord to help you grow through the experience. Use the above strategy to assist in the process.

Yes, words can hurt, but how we handle criticism matters more.

 

 

 

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About the author : Kurt Bubna

Kurt Bubna

Kurt W. Bubna is a blogger, author, speaker, regular radio and television personality, and the Sr. Pastor of Eastpoint Church, a large non-denominational congregation in Spokane Valley, Washington. Bubna published his first book, Epic Grace: Chronicles of a Recovering Idiot, with Tyndale in 2013. He has also published Mr. & Mrs.: How to Thrive in Perfectly Imperfect Marriage, The Rookie’s Guide to Getting Published, a children’s book and a devotional. He and his wife, Laura, have been married for over forty years and have four grown children and seven grandchildren.

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